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annotate avt-cryptex-review.txt @ 4:a88cd2ff0a89

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done through section 9
author Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
date Fri, 27 Oct 2023 15:31:55 +0100
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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1 Document: draft-ietf-avtcore-cryptex-05
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2 Intended RFC status: Proposed Standard
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3 Review type: artart - Last Call review
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4 Reviewer: Henry S. Thompson
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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5 Review Date: 2022-04-05
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6 IETF Last Call Date: 2022-04-05
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7
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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8 Summary: Almost Ready
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9
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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10 Caveat: I'm not a user of Secure Real-time Transport Protocol (SRTP)
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11 so am only reviewing this from a non-expert perspective.
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12
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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13 Minor points
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14
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15 Section 5.2. Receiving
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16 "The implementation MAY stop and report an error if it
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17 considers use of this specification mandatory for the RTP stream."
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18
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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19 This reads oddly to me, as if it was originally written with 'may'
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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20 rather than 'MAY'. I think what is meant is more like the following:
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21
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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22 Alternatively, in the presence of extensions but the absence of a
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23 matching value, an implementation MAY signal that it requires use
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24 of this specification by stopping and signalling an error.
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25
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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26 6.1 Packet Structure
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27
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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28 I _think_ this diagram combines parts of diagrams taken from 3711
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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29 (Section 3.1 Figure 1) and 8285 (section 4.2). The latter is an
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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30 _example_, and as such the "length=3" in the 6th line of the diagram
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31 doesn't really belong in something labelled generically "the SRTP
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32 packet is protected as follows", which seems to imply that what
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33 follows is a template for all such packets.
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34
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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35 Not sure whether the best way to fix this is by expanding the label
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36 ("for example an SRTP packet with 3 header extensions would be protected as
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37 follows") or by replacing "length=3" with something like "[number of
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38 extension headers]".
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39
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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40 Nits
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41
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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42 A number of acronyms are not glossed at first use, e.g. SRTP, SSRC, CSRC.
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43 If anyone reading this RFC can be expect to be familiar with them
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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44 perhaps that's OK...
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45
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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46 Section 9.1
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47
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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48 Is there a line break or two missing [in the plain text version]
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49 here--------------------------
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50 |
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51 v
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Henry S. Thompson <ht@inf.ed.ac.uk>
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52 as described in this document. O/A procedures: SDP O/A procedures